At the end of your world? Isn't it a bit arrogant to say "at the end of your world"? You have no Idea what I am like so don't tell me you are "at the end of my world"!
Yes it would be arrogant, but that's not the point. The title has almost nothing to do with the listeners world.
It's a quote from Annarchy's past (She has to go to the end of her world and above before she's allowed to die), it's the location of "Longing Island" (In the middle of nowhere) and it's of course the end of my creative landscape, so please, don't feel offended because of the title.
So what's the story behind the whole "Tears Of A Child"-Project?
The Tears are a bunch of Kids, who are living in a post apocalyptic, dark and surreal world.
Here is what happened until now:
- One day, Annarchy arrived at the Bloodshore.
- Under the leadership of her, the children of this forsaken place (Gally and Ian) gathered to become this group/band. The Tears.
- Annarchy is the only one who remembers her past and how everything became such a mess.
- They soon find a deactivated robot (Ham) in the trash of the Scrapland and reactivate him.
- He leads them to an secret underground-research lab, where they get access to many strange machines.
- Ham's dad, a mad scientist, who was called "The Jester", worked there on a plan to recover from a strange illness, which seems to have killed him before he finished his plan.
- One of the machines they've found - the "portable radiotronik device" - gives them the ability to send messages into the past.
- Someone in this past is receiving those messages in his head. He begins to hear everything they send through the prd and is able to even communicate with the Kids trough his thoughts.
- Anna wants this guy to spread their work and words. She will call him the "Metatron".
- A new kid arrives at the Bloodshore, she is called Heather and joins the Tears after some dissensions.
- Heather (The new Tear) remembers fragments of her past; Ian seems to be a big role in that.
- Anna wants her new family to be happy, so she plans to leave the Bloodshore behind and manages to build a boat to do so.
- Now they are ready to leave, in hope of finding a new and more lively place to call their home, they set sail...
Why do they call themself "Tears"?
The name origins from Dostoevsky's "The Brothers Karamazov"
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
...and so I renounce the higher harmony altogether. It’s not worth the tears of that one tortured child who beat itself on the breast with its little fist and prayed in its stinking outhouse, with its unexpiated tears to ‘dear, kind God’! It’s not worth it, because those tears are unatoned for.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
...and so I renounce the higher harmony altogether. It’s not worth the tears of that one tortured child who beat itself on the breast with its little fist and prayed in its stinking outhouse, with its unexpiated tears to ‘dear, kind God’! It’s not worth it, because those tears are unatoned for.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
But it's also some kind of wordplay:
Since I (The guy behind this) has problems in living out his emotions (except in having really bad nervous breakdowns xD), the things I do have to serve as some kind of psychic-therapy. So I decided to call my band "Tears".
The tears of a really childlike person.
The Tears Of A Child.
Also: There is nothing more emotional than the tears of a child,
wether they origin from crying or laughing.
What does the cover show?
The Cover of this album shows "Longing Island" an Island in the middle of nowhere. Something like the Neverland of J. M. Barrie's "Peter Pan". The plants there are purple and pink, the sand is white and the sea arround is reflecting the everlasting starry sky above it. Every minute at least one falling star can be seen on the sky and echoes of whispered wishes are traveling with the wind. If you look closely enough you can see (young) Anna in the upper-left corner of the cover. With her is a very important person of her past, somebody who becomes very important in the story of the second album.
She called her "Rabbit".
The Story / Track By Track
Through the Waves Of The Bloodshore
Anna reads her goodbye-letter to Metatron, because she doesn't know if the PRD will work at other places than the Bloodshore. Metatron gets really depressed after their depature and as he loses contact with the Tears. The Song symbolizes 1. Metatron feelings and 2. the journey mood of the tears, who are building and launching their boat to travel to new horizons.
Annarchy Rising
After some days at sea the tears get into a storm. They are fighting against the crushing waves and the unpredictable weather. The boat gets destroyed in a fierce storm and Annarchy falls overboard and nearly drowns. In an inner monolouge she recaps the last months and remembers the promise she gave Rabbit those long gone days.
"You have to go to the end of your world and above!!! You are not allowed to die, can you hear me?! Not allowed, until... until... you........ hah! Until you find a flower exactly looking like the one I've tattooed ya!
promised?"
Annas will to survive is stronger than the raging sea and she rises from the deep. After she saves an unconscious Gally; Heather, Ham and Ian - now on some plankets - swim to them. They fight against the storm but soon even Annarchy loses her strenght and passes out.
Longing Island
The Tears awake on an white and lonely beach. Ham watched over them and waited till they all came back to consciousness. Ham was surprised, even Ian (who never sleeps) got unconscious...
They start to explore the Island.
The purple plants, the disembodied voices and the surreal environment are disturbing Anna...
Anna get's the impression of being watched, she turns around and sees something moving behind the purple plants and tries to hunt it down.
It gets away, maybe she was just imagining things again...
Rabbit Land
Heather finds the flag, they've created for their new home on the stoney and cliffy part of the Island.
In an discussion the Tears decide to stay on the Island for a while.
With the rest of them, Anna starts climbing on the mountain of the Island to get a good view.
"In the name of the tears, This place will soon be known as Rabbit Land!"
Anna remembers the days she spend with Rabbit...
She misses her badly, a silent but very strong wish leaves her lips.
AlexSame time, different place... Pagliacci the superhero-clown wanders a desert of broken glass in search of his beloved "Cat", the 7 year old girl he used to know, before he got into this twisted world. He wanders for an eternity and at the moment he finally remembers his real identity, he gets unconscious. As he awakes he finds himself on Longing Island. He got washed up and the tears cared about him, the time he was uncunscious.
As the days go by, Alex tries to become acquainted to the kids and even starts remembering more about his past. He was a nurse in a cancer-hospital and tried to amuse the ill children with his clown performances. One of the girls told him that she hates clowns, but loves heroes...
"...You are both of them, so I don't really know what to think of you..."
That girl was Cat and that conversatíon was the beginning of the best friendship Alex ever had. He asks himself if Cat could be on this island too...
Uskaja Intro
In Alex's stories about the past he also mentions that online game he played. "Memories of Uskaja"...
Ian and Heather react to this. Heather tried to tell them about this game, but was disabled by her stitched together mouth. With the help of Alex, they realize that this online game was the place where Ian and Heather got to know each other and that Heathers current appearance resembles the "Chimaira" Race of the game very much.
Uskaja Calling
Even though populated by many strange races, the world of Uskaja is ruled by one deity and her empire. Aiosophe, the one living in the Tower of Ember, in the heart of her Isskel empire. The tower of Aiosophe is the birthplace of every race, except the cruel and harsh Darok Khan, a babarian empire of bloodthirsty mutating vampire-like people. Many other races are an important force in the world of Uskaja too: the cunning Faykin, the plantlike Kafun, the undead Lich and the Chimaira, a race of hybrids, who are expulsed by the other races to die in the waves of the sea... But many Chimaira survived this treatment and settled on the islands of the green seas, seeking for revenge on the Isskel empire.
...Uskaja is an exotic and beautiful world from the outside, but behind this fancy curtain lingers a rotten place of slavery, brutality and unfairness...
At The End Of Your World
A few days later Ian dissappears. The Tears start to search him on the whole island.
On the stoney cliffs, on the giant shipwreck on the north side, and in the purple jungle. There they finally find something. A strange research facility, which they start to explore. They enter and search for clues of their zombie-friend. Ham's surprised, he finds the Asyl logo, the one he has on his chest everywhere in this lab. Due to generators, this facility still has electric energy to offer and Anna starts to search the pcs, for information. She isn't able to find anything helpfull except a very cryptic digital diary of some workers.
She begins to read it....
Meanwhile Heather finds Ian in the garden of the research lab, with a giant stranger. It seems that this glasshouse garden tries to simulate an autumn like state. Under the big golden Oak Heather sees Ian smiling, while he is talking to the weirdo. The stranger, which hands are in fact giant red claws, creeps her out and she tries to convince Ian of comming back to the other Tears... But she fails. The stranger introduces himself kindly as Stanley and leaves with Ian, who's stating in an incredible bold and lively way that they are long time friends and there is no reason to worry. As they leave, the other Tears finally come along and Heather tries to tell them about Stanley. (As good as she's able to) Anna gets angry, equips herself with her baseball bat and wants to talk with that Stanley-Guy...
But where have they gone to?
Heather runs ahead, searching for Ian!
In the moment she leaves, Alex and Ham show up.
They've found some strange looking robots, helicopterlike spy-drones which they wanna try out.
Anna bites her thumb.
Perfect.
A few minutes later 10 little spy-robot-drones fly around the whole Island to search for Ian and his creepy companion.
Finally one of them spots them... And they are building a boat?
Anna is irritated, she thinks a minute about it and runs off shocked.
The others, except Gally, who is controlling the robots, wait for a second, look at each other and follow her in hurry!
"If the diary is right... This Island is going to do it again... Hrm, at least I finally know what happened to Ian."
Anna runs as fast as she can.
She comes to late, Ian and Stanley are a few meters away floating in the water...
Anna starts to swim.
Meanwhile Stanley and Ian are talking in their boat:
"I don't wanna move to Brisbane... This sucks." Ian says
"..."
"As soon as I find somone I like in this dirthole I have to move away... It's so unfair."
"..."
"Man, this drink tastes like garbage... Why are you so quiet Stan?"
Stanley sighs
"You don't know what it's like to be alone Ian, you really have no idea.
You don't know what it's like to stay up everyday, go to a job you don't like, serving people you hate, only to return into your ugly lonely world..."
"What are you talking about Stan?"
"You don't know what it's like to have no childhood, to have no friends, to get bullied by everyone around you and get screwed by life!
It's funny, Life always comes and shows me what it could be,
only to take it away in the next moment!
Hell... I am done with it..."
"Stan?"
Ian has problems holding his eyes open, his strength vanishes.
"This time...
I will take it away from her."
Stanley's diabolical grin is the last thing Ian sees before he passes out.
...
05.07.1996 Entry #19: This Island...
It seems crazy but this Island... I think it feeds on the memories of people. This Island: Longing Island. We are here, shipwrecked at the end of the world. Everyday things get washed up, things people have left behind, have forgotten or blocked out... 2 people of our team are dead, 3 are in an catatonic state and I? I've seen Carren again. She stared at me... Oh this eyes, I am so sorry for what I've done to you, so incredible sorry. I want to forget, again... But this Island don't want me to, this Island don't allows me to.
Anna fights the waves, she isn't allowed to fail.
"Rabbit, I've found a new family here, you were right, there are things in this dead world, worth living and fighting for... I won't allow anyone to take this away from me again!"
Just as Anna climbs up the boat, Stanley wanted to throw the passed out Ian overboard.
Soaked, Anna clenches her fist.
"Give him to me and you won't be harmed..." She says calmly.
"He is mine! No one will take him away from me! Not his parents, not you, no one!"
"That's it? You want to kill him, because you don't want him to leave?!"
"Why do you think they are moving away?! I'll tell you why, because it's not normal that such an young boy hangs around with an old "sick bastard" like me! People are speaking things around our backs. I am not allowed to see him anymore, the whole world goes crazy because I am not allowed to have a friend."
"And so you are giving them the reason why they were right in having such worries?"
"...What?"
"I've said, you are giving them the ultimate reason why somone like you should not be around Ian!
You have become the reason yourself and you didn't even notice it..."
"You..."
Stanley looks at his giant red hand-claws.
"...Are right?"
"I've, I've become the beast myself..."
He starts to giggle.
"That's the best irony she's given me so far."
He starts to laugh.
"This is a sick dream, when am I'm going to wake up?"
"This is not a dream... This is reality, and you have finally woken up Stanley"
He sits down.
Tears roll down his face.
He looks at his bloody claw-hands soullessly.
 |
| Ian and Stanley |
One of the spy robots arrive.
Anna carries Ian to the robot, she ties him on and holds on herself.
Gallys voice appears through the Drone.
"What's with him?"
Anna takes a last look at the disgusting figure that was born from Ian memories.
Memories about his best friend and murderer, the 36 year old Stanley Tompson.
"We are done here..."
The robot flies back to Longing Island.
In the distance the boat Stanley is catatonically sitting in, dissappears in the fog, which sorrounds "Longing Island" now and then.
Anna knows, that this was only the beginning.
The Island had spoken and will do it again.
Jesse
A few days later...
The Tears have moved into the "Asyl"-Facility.
They want to explore the giant lab entirely.
After a few hours they find a door which requires some keycards to open it, luckily Anna has gathered everything that resembles an important object in this place.
The door opens.
Ham is shocked, there are many of this tanklike things in it, which he has also has in his chest.
Heather climbs up one of these thing and looks inside the small glass-slit.
"Empty!" She tries to shout and jumps over to the next.
"Empty!" again.
While Heathers "Empty!" cascade continues, Anna walks trough the hallway only to find something spectatcular at the end of the long room.
At the end of this hallway lies one transparent tank filled with turquoise water and... a little Girl.
"Jesse #01" is written on the tank.
"Do you think she is still alive?!" Gally asks agitated.
...
They open it
...
 |
| Jesse |
Under the care of Gally and Ham, Jesse recovers from her long sleep a few days later.
She is not able to speak, but learns very quick.
In the room they've found her, another message of Hams Father, "The Jester", was found.
The melodramatic and cryptic film delivers information about Jester and Jesses relationship.
After the failure of project "Jes.2" (Ham). Jester realized that the Virus in his body is only attacking the y-chromosomes. So the misogynic mastermind started a program of creating a female clone of himself, because surviving was way over his hatred towards women. Many trials failed, but finally he created "Jesse #1" a genetic masterpiece.
Hearts Of Darkness
Even though, or maybe because Jesse keeps them on their toes, Anna starts to become more and more melancholic. She sits on a cliff of longing Island, her favorite spot; the place she had put the "Rabbit Land flag" in. Everything has changed so much in the last year, she doesn't know if this is supposed to be right.
Everyday, her memories seems to fade more and more into the nothingness and she get's afraid of loosing her last memories of Rabbit.
She misses her so badly...
But what is she supposed to do?
Surviving another year in this world, in which everything can change every second? Is she supposed to live in this viscious circle of forgetting forever? She's desperate and starts to cry.
Alex is hearing it and walks towards her... She pretends to be okay and takes the bottle he brought with.
Alex don't know what to say, he keeps quiet.
...Silence for a few minutes...
After a while Anna rests her head on his shoulder, he's irritated but pretends to be okay.
She smiles and a rain of falling stars can be seen on the horizon...
Same time, a few meters away.
Gally, Jesse and Ham are screaming and dancing around a fire while Heather is resting her head on Ians thighs. She smiles, even though the twine of her stitched mouth tries to prevent it.
Home Is Where...?
A few hours later, Anna awakes.
Alex sleeps on her side, they've both fallen asleep on this cliff.
She smiles and walks to the flag.
The dark memories of her past come back and she asks herself if this island is the right place for her and her horde.
Is this the home she was searching for?
She walks to the others.
Everyone, except Ham is asleep now.
On her walk she finally realizes that searching a home is irrelevant, as long as you are with your family...
"Home... As long as we're all together, we are already at home".
Her eyes expand.
She seperates from the group and runs back to the shore.
"What have I done?!
...Metatron, please forgive me!..."
Labyrinth
Anna gets lost in the purple jungle of Longing Island.
Something is behind her, or is she imagining things again?
She has no time to get crazy now.
She runs for an eternity, but don't seem to make progress, what's going on here?!
Anna gets exhausted.
She hears a voice.
"It can't be..."
As she lift her head, she can't believe her eyes....
"Rabbit?! Is that you!?"
"Yep."
"But... but... you are de..."
"Psscht, Sweets" She puts a finger on Anna's lips to silence her.
"Stop talking such rabbish. I am fine, and here, only for you. Didn't you wished for me to return?"
Almost voiceless she replies:
"Nothing more..."
Anna grabs her hand and waits a few seconds.
With her voice returning, she says:
"But I've realized something. Even though I am somewhat grateful for the offering you are giving to me, Longing Island... I am not buying it any second longer! I am what I am, and I AM the gathering of events in my past, I am, what happenes, happened and will happen to me. I am what I am doing and what is done to me, no matter how painful, unfair or twisted it was. I am not one of your Puppets, you can't control me any longer and you won't control anyone of my family!
I!
Annarchy, will find a way to take you down, down as I've done it with Xerxas a year ago.
Listen to me you demons, spirits, angels and pancakefaces of this twisted world...
You are no match for me!
While the Illusion shatters, Rabbit smiles.
Anna walks her by, without looking back.
"I am accepting your challenge, Sweets."
Anna leaves the Labyrinth.
Tears Of A Child
On the shore of Longing Island, Anna finds the PRD.
She reactivates it and........... It's still working!
Bursting into tears, Anna excuses her stubborn actions.
"I am so sorry Met, I've finally realized how important you have become and that you are part of our family...
I was so dumb in leaving you behind like this!
...
I won't leave you behind anymore, never again!"
...
"Promised!"
...
"please talk to me..."
...
I can't stand that silence, please... say anything!
....Silence...
And then?
"Anything."
Anna gasps for a moment and then starts to giggle.
She's so glad, tears roll down her cheek and she even hugs the PRD.
The other Tears finally arrive at the shore. As soon as Gally and Ham realize that Anna is talking over the PRD to Metatron they run toward it, only to shout their happiness of his return.
Even Ian smiles and moves towards the machine.
"Have you at least found a new home?"
"Yep." Anna grins while she starts a grouphug.
The only ones left behind are Alex, Jesse and Heather.
Jesse looks questioning, while Alex asks Heather:
"Who are they talking to?"
Heather cuts the strings on her mouth with her sharp claw to grin.
"The 8th Tear of course."
And starts pushing them both towards the group hug.
In The Sand Of Longing Island
With the machines of the Asyl-Facility the Tears manage it to build a big radio antenna. Their first show and message for Messy-World (That's how Gally calls it) is:
"This Message is for everyone out there.
Every lost soul.
My name is Annarchy
I am the leader of the Tears
and we are hear at longing Island.
If we are ready for life?
Ask different:
Is life ready for us?"
BONUS SONGS
The 1. Messy-World Radio Show
Surface Of The Sun
Since Sunshine was one of Rabbits favorite movies and Anna loves the main theme, they've covered it in their first Radioshow.
Battle Angel
Anna has frequently stated that "Battle Angel Alita" is one of her absolute favorite Comics/Manga. So she decided to do a new Alita song for the first radioshow... The song "Battle Angel" was born.
Dark Days Are Coming
This one is the first Song Alex has contributet in.
It's about a villain he created for the comicbook he was working on.
The Villain is called:
The Humanimal
and it's story is kinda tragic:
Doctor Ewan Dolsen, a genius on the field of genetic research, receives frequently harsh critic. His theory on how insects are able to use a parallel dimension to teleport from one place to another has made him a laughingstock under the scientists. Dolsen thinks that the "fairy myth", origins from butterflies who are using this dimension which mythological name soon became the "fairy realm". While Dolsens work on the so called "Humanimal Project" for the bioweapon company I.s.Star is going fine, a more sinister and egocentric plan of proving his butterfly theories arises in his mind. As soon as the "Huminamal Field Generator" is finished, he uses his own daughter to participate as guinea pig. The humanimal project was called into life for mixing human characteristics with those of animals to create something like a supersoldier. However Dolsen thought the field would mix the characteristics of the butterfly with the beauty of his daughter and give her the ability to change into the parralelldimension. It didn't turn out that well. Humanimal was an abberation, a monster from the outside. And a twisted young woman on the inside. She was inprisoned in the facility as test subject for the next weeks, but freed herself soon with her abilities. She wanted to go home and as soon as she arrived there, she realized that she never was Eva, the daughter of Dolsen. Dolsen cloned his daughter for the first test with the "humanimal field". In anger, Humanimal killed everyone at home, even the original Eva. Since then the Humanimal is making the town a more dangerous place. Notes from Alex:
Humanimal: Eva Dolsen + Blue Pansy (Junonia orithya)
Fights with: A Butterlfy knive
Collects "beatiful" stuff like: ears and jewelry...
Dark Days
That's it.
I hope you like it!
Thanks for the read, the support and everything else.
Metatron over.
